i have a great TV show idea...

this show will be on ABC, on Friday nights, right before Shark Tank

This show is called KickStarter, sponsored by KickStarter...

it's basically a live TV show, where entrepreneurs come on, and they get 10-15 minutes to pitch their slightly out-of-the-box idea. Viewers at home can donate money if they like the idea. And there is a running live tally of all of the donations on the screen. do you get it?

for example, some guy will pitch his idea of a skateboard that is electric that runs off of salt water, and he has a prototype that seems pretty cool. you at home think he's interesting and entertaining, so you send him $2 via venmo or paypal. 8 minutes into his schpiel shpeel, his donations are at $180,000! WOW!

i'd watch this

After substitute teaching for a couple months, i have realized that when I was younger, I was a very easy student. I wouldn't say I was a good student, but I was easy for the teachers. When i say "good student", I think of students who went above and beyond. They asked good questions, they actively participated, they slightly challenged the teacher. I wasn't that type of student, but i was an easy student for my teachers. I was always quiet, i listened, i was never disruptive, and i generally did my homework and assignments, i wasn't going to complain to my parents that my teachers don't know anything. I was easy

 I was talking to rick about math teachers at West high. I generally liked all my teachers, I thought they taught me things that I didn't know. But rick, who is smarter then me, didn't particularly like one math teacher. why? something like she constantly made mistakes during class lessons. lol if a teacher makes a mistake during a class lesson, that bothers me 2%. to me, it's nooooooo problem...

some things that i found interesting.

-my very first class was 5th grade. there was like 35 kids. the teacher didn't leave a lesson plan, so i was on my own. they were loud and talkative. the classroom next to us was doing state testing..about an hour into my first day. the teacher from next door walks into the room and basically yells at my class that "you're being too loud....blah blah blah..."      so pretty much it's my fault. then the kids tricked me into playing silent ball. And after 5 minutes of playing silent ball, no one was eliminated, so i told them no more silent ball.

-there was this one kid named Rock. no really R-O-C-K. and he talked all the time.. so one time i slightly yelled "the rock, sit down!"....all the kids laughed because i yelled THEROCK.

-one time i subbed this 4th grade class. really cool class. one kid asked what my first name was. i said it's Mr. Mizuno. and that was that.. earlier in the day. the school gave me a sticker name tag. i wrote my first and last name. i stuck it to my coffee mug. one kid saw it. and started yelling. "you're name's grant. hahaha. you're name's grant...hahah"     Yes, you win "you're name's grant, ahhaah!"

-I think the 3rd time i subbed. and the first time I taught older kids. i was very strict about phones. i asked every single student to put away their phones. that was a waste. you're not going to win that battle, at least as a sub.

-I can't believe how hard it is for some people to pronounce my last name. or, i guess i'm surprised at how many people don't even try to sound it out. even adults. 

when i tell someone that my dad is a farmer. i usually get 3 questions.
what does he grow?
is it organic?
are there any animals on the farm?

my bland answers are asparagus, tomatoes, beans, corn...no...and no...
-----
i've thought about it long and hard. i've decided to spice it up a little bit. just a little bit...
if someone asks... what is the main crop?
"asparagus"
oh cool, is it organic?
"yes! the whole farm is organic!"
oh wow, that's awesome, so what stores can you find your asparagus...
"well, lots of places actually! you can find them at local farmer's markets! my dad regularly attends 3-5 farmer's markets in the area. not only that, we are in Whole Foods aaaand  Trader Joe's!"
!!!

i was disappointed about Furious7.

maybe my expectations were a little too high...the reviews were really good and there was a lot of hype,
not too mention that grace is a big Fast&Furious fan.

-i still don't understand the popularity of the movies. and like i've said before, i feel that everyone who says it's good is playing a prank on me. they are waiting for me to say "yeah, it's good". and bam, they got me!

-the only 2 that i can re-watch and be happy about it. is the first one...and tokyo drift.

-derek and i had the first one on DVD. i remember watching it the first time and thinking WOW, this is what i want! I want to be a racer. i want to buy an Eclipse like paul walker, and make it fast. embarrassingly, i remember i subscribed to import tuner for 1 year. i was such a weirdo. i'm so glad i didn't get a chance to go that route. i miss the jimmy

it finally happened...i caught Grace..
she slipped...

we were at the beach with kirkham. it was pretty hot and kirkham was running around a bit. he was breathing hard like a husky kid. so grace pulls stop out a water bottle and starts to pour some  into her cupped hand. and kirkham starts to drink the water from her cupped hand. she does this one more time....and i just laugh and give her a hard time because she loves doing motherly things with kirkham. so then grace starts to pour maybe the 4th handfull of water and she says "babe, do you want some more water?"

SLIP....i ask her "did you just call him babe?"
she was scared and told me something like "hm, i was talking to you"  lol
"soooooooooooooooo.  you want me to drink water out of your cupped hand?"

"ok, oops"
--------------------------------

kirkham has been more friendly as of late. he won't bark as much when friends or family come over. however, he still growls/barks at dogs when we walk by them. grace and i are convinced that he secretly calls other dogs ugly as we walk by...

so we think as we walk by another dog...the other dog says "hello there" and kirkham passively says "you're ugly"....and then the growls/barking starts

The Jinx on HBO was the best thing i've ever seen. it's a 6 part series, and it's the best thing i've ever seen on television. even better then the 1st season of homeland.

spoilers.
-after watching, i read that the documentary showed some events out of order..like the 2nd interview with durst and the arrest for trespassing. i don't think that was necessary, i don't really see the point

-i also read that the directors didn't find the very last 'bathroom recording' until months after the 2nd interview. which is very very very hard to believe. durst already showed that he forgot his mic was hot in the 1st interview.

-the "beverley hills" cadaver note all seemed too perfect. when the lady was first murdered  20 years ago, and when the police received the cadaver note...everyone in the world must have suspected durst to be the murderer. wouldn't someone think to check durst's hand writing to see if it matched??? it all seems a little too obvious. is durst that psycho to NOT change his hand writing when sending the cadaver note?

-after i finished watching the last episode, i went on my phone to read more about the documentary. then i see durst was arrested in TExas. minddddd blownn

 the best thing i've ever seen

grace and i filled out our brackets the night before the tournament started this year. it was funny to see her strategy. i've watched maybe 3 college basketball games this year. aaand i know that it's pretty much a crapshoot, so i fill mine out my bracket in3 minutes. but not ms. neuroscience, she's too smart for this, first she googles "ncaa predictions" and reads what the "experts" are saying... ha

and it's funny how grace has these strong opinions on NCAA men's basketball...unless she's secretly watching games when she's at school. i'm pretty sure she hasn't seen any games this year. she told me something like "no way Duke wins...." I ask her why.... and she says something like "they lost last year..."

ahh, good point.

then she asks me "what does SMU stand for?"....I tell her Southern methodist University...She says no way they beat UCLA...

in her defense, grace beat me last year...
well. i have wisconsin to win, she has kentucky...

oh. and when we were driving from LA to santa barbara. it was quiet in the car, then she blurts out....I HATE MATCH MARDNESS.

amazon is becoming too cluttered. if i need to buy some new lint rollers because kirkham is shedding like dog, i search on amazon and there are 50 different type of sizes and brands of lint rollers. some come in packs of 6, some are jumbo sized. some are Scotch- branded, and some are specifically designed for pets. lots of bull shit. too many options, i don't have time to sit here and compare prices, read reviews, then make a decision.

that's why i like costco and especially trader joe's...less options, less choices, which makes it so much quicker.

it's almost the end of the year, so that means it's reflection time. 

well, without getting into specifics. i think what i learned most this year is that unbelievable things happen. and i understand that people throw around "unbelievable" like it's nothing. but i'm being serious, truly unbelievable things are capable of happening. 

i think it's interesting, that as you get older, you realize that you didn't know shit when you were younger. when you're 17 years old, you think you know some stuff, but you realize later that you don't. when you're 22 years old, you think you've got it sort of figured out, but you don't. i mean, how do parents not tell their kids "you don't know shit". if i have kids one day, how do i NOT just tell them over and over that they don't know shit. 

i remember in college, i read a blog of a really popular poker player, and one sentence always stood out to me, he said "you're going to get more unlucky then you thought was possible". i'll always remember that, i'm not sure why. now i know i'm a pessimist, but i think it goes both ways. i think it's safe to say now, that you are going to get extremely lucky in life, more then you thought was possible. but it's going to be harder to see the lucky instances then the unlucky experiences. everyone reading this has at least 10 things in their life that someone else would die for. you have above average athleticism? you lucky bastard. you have parents that you enjoy spending time with? you're lucky. you're asian and you don't turn red when you drink? you dodged a bullet there. you met someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with? wow, don't ever complain

you're going to get more unlucky then you thought was possible. and i think everyone has to realize this. everyone is both lucky and unlucky. superrrrr lucky, and super unlucky sometimes. it's going to balance out, and if it doesn't. if you really think the luck factor doesn't balance itself out, then you're crazy, or maybe just unlucky

1 month with kirkham. kirkham is a dog.

kirkham stays with grace in davis. so i only see him on weekends.

-he's been a great dog, no complaints.

-grace lovesss kirkham. no no, you don't understand. grace lovesss kirkham. they love each other. kirkham is a little baby when grace has to leave him. he'll start to cry as soon as grace leaves

-he is super calm, very rarely barks unless a new person comes into the house for the first time.

-he loves to cuddle

-grace always says that he is "soooo smart". a typical conversation goes something like this

go- he's sooo smart!

gm- no way, he's probably just average

go- how can you say that.

gm- i'm not trying to hate, but he's most likely just average. he's probably just as smart as any other terrier

go- ugh

gm- everyone thinks that their dog is smarter then average, but EVERY dog CANNOT be smarter then average

go- you're an idiot

-when we take him out for walks/poop. we grab the collar and stand by the door. MOST times he runs up to the door and he sits, and we put the collar on, and we go. this one time, grace was cooking so i was going to take him out. i grab the collar, walk to the door and bend down to put the collar on, i say "kirkham, sit". and grace turns around and she says something like "do not tell him to sit, he already knows!" (LOLL). As if i were insulting his intelligence by telling him to sit. sooo funny. just this past week, we were ready to go outside, and kirkham would not sit, and grace didn't want to say "sit", so we stood there for about 3 minutes. i didn't say anything because i didn't want to be an asshole, but in my head i was screaming "loltoldyou LOLTOLDYOU"

-when we adopted him from the oakland animal shelter, his name was Checkers. we said no thanks, and it's been kirkham ever since. and last week, i half jokingly asked grace "do you think he knows his name". grace said of course. and then i yelled "BICYCLE!" at kirkham to see if he would respond like normal..

 for the rest of the day, sometimes i would yell "kirkham" and sometimes i would yell "bicycle". it was really funny, but i think you had to be there. we must have said something similar to this 50 times. "BICYCLE....see he looked....Kirkham....oh there...he looked....Kirkham....see he looked again...Bicycle!!! he didn't look"

poor kirkham, grace and i were joking after, he was probably thinking "i thought my name was kirkham, but now these humans are calling me bicycle???"

-you don't understand how much grace loves kirkham, it's funny, she will always defend him. when grace is around, kirkham can do NOwrong. 

=when kirkham had an accident in the house. grace will say something like "oh, that was my fault, i kept him in too long". 

=when kirkham spilled all of grace's coffee in the car, it was the "stupid leash's fault"

=when kirkham destroyed Grace's keropi stuffed animal, i said "o0o0o0o0, kirkham fucked up"..

and grace said something like "well, how is he supposed to differentiate his toys from my toys...i shouldn't have left it out"

(i wrote this 2 weeks ago)
my dad called me last week and said his friend has 4 extra Giants tickets for the Thursday game, against the Diamondbacks at 12:45. ok great, russ jon grace and I will go. it's a beautiful day, the Giants are winning, then it's late in the game, and it's time for the kiss cam. grace and i pop up on the jumbotron/megatron

1. i enjoy watching the kiss cam. it's entertaining, and sometimes funny. i always watch it, isn't it the best in-between-inning thing? i think so. just before the kiss cam starts, grace turns to me and asks me to read this "super important" email. (OK, it wasn't that important..as i started to read the email on her phone, i specifically asked "what exactly am i supposed to be reading?"....and i remember i said it with a 15% attitude just because i'm a jerk). any way, i keep reading this email, and then i hear jon and russ yell at me "grant. grant. look,  you're on. grant"

2. i look up at the jumbotron and i see the side of my face. and then i'm 90% sure i said "oh shit". and then, i look to my left, and then back to the jumbotron, and then i look to the right, and then back to the jumbotron. i was trying to see which way the camera was coming from. (this all happened in about 2-3 seconds). but it's weird when you're caught off guard like that. in that 2-3 seconds, in my head. i wanted to be able to look at the jumbotron and see myself looking straight (which is obviously impossible)

3. then grace finally grabs my face. boom. and it's onto the next couple.

4. then it was over. i asked everyone how long do you think we were on the jumbo tron for, they said roughly 6 seconds. 

5. i want to see a replay. i was telling grace that i would pay to watch a replay of the kisscam from that game. i think i would pay $200. Why don't the Giants upload it to youtube. you bastards, i'll pay! just let me pay, give me the option.

6. we were so unprepared. it's disgusting. if i had to do it over again, i think a cool idea would be just to completely ignore the camera. like before the kiss cam starts, agree to something like "grace, so if they show us on the kiss cam, look straight and don't move. ignore the world and hold it for as long as you can. you can do it"

7. it would have been nice to be watching the kiss cam and see us pop up there unexpectedly. but grace just had to show me this super important email.

next time, i'll be prepared. but there won't be a next time. how did i not buy any jeremy lin rookie cards???

i've never played daily fantasy sports, but i like the idea of it. and i can see why it's so popular. 

1. it's bull shit that fantasy sports is considered a "skill game" and poker is not. 

2. i had a close friend play daily fantasy sports and tell me about it. i don't know much, but in my opinion....there's no edge unless you have some computer/algorithmic model to help. if you're a casual fan that watches a few televised games per week, there's just not enough edge. and even if you do have a slight edge against your opponents, it's not enough to overcome the entry fee

3. first off, i think 80% of fantasy sports participants think they are better then the average fantasy sports player. everyone thinks they are sharp. i think i'm sharp, and i'm probably just average.

4. but yeah, there's no edge in fantasy sports for 95% of people playing on these sites because you can't make mistakes in fantasy sports. in poker, if you're a bad player, you can make lots and lots of mistakes. if you watch a good player and a bad player for one hour each, you can SEE the mistakes the bad player makes. but in fantasy sports, it's hard to make biggg mistakes. most decisions are only slightlyyyyyy better then other decisions (the edges are so small).  for example, if my mom faced off against the best daily fantasy player in the world, she might win 40% of the time....but if mom faced off against the best poker player in the world, she might win only 2% of the time. it's too hard to mess up in daily fantasy sports

5. i think stories like this mail guy are slightly bogus. it's in Fanduel's best interest to make people think that "hey, even this mailman can make money, you can do it too try it today!!!" i get it, they have to market it that way. fanduel needs people to think that average sports fans can win (even though only < 1% are actually making money) if this mailman was seriously making decent money, would he really not quit his day job? 

6. i know nothing, but i think that there IS money to be made in daily fantasy sports, but you need to have some computer model that no one else has. that's your EDGE. i think less then 2% of players have a model this good. the rest of the 98% are passing money back and forth. you might win 54% of your head-to-head matches, but that's not going to cut it. the entry fees will slowly eat you alive (just like Fanduel wants it).

7. i'm not hating though, i like the idea. i just don't think an average to slightly above average fantasy player can make any money playing it. if you think of it as entertainment, then go ahead, play. but if you think you're sharp and can beat it, goooood luck

my top 5 favorite robin williams movies
5. Jumanji.
i thinkkkkk that we had this on vhs. i remember liking this movie, but being 10% scared throughout the entire movie. for some odd reason i'll always remember the riddle on the first roll of the dice..."in the jungle you must wait, til the dice read five or eight!"

4. Hook.
We had this movie on VHS, and i remember i would only watch the last half of the movie. the first half was boring as balls. the last half is awesomeee when he meets the lost boys and rufio.  and one of my favorite parts was when all the kids were eating the neon colored food and then they have a food fight.

3. Jack.
I loved this movie. funny and sad at the same time.

2. Good Will Hunting.
it never gets old. i can always watch it
my 3 favorite scenes are 3) when matt damon gets the girls phone # at the bahhh. 2) when robin williams tells the story of when he knew his wife was the oneeeee 1) the very end, when matt damon had to go see about a girl (what a line!)

1. Mrs. Doubtfire.
behind Teenage mutant ninja turtles 2 and Twister, this was probably the most played vhs for me.

i'm all in on the lebron/free agency news. if he goes back to cleveland, it's huuuuge. it makes me mad though, i want to see another ESPN special, The Decision 2. this time around, i'm probably going to find out through twitter or a text message, boringg. THE DECISION was amazing, and i want another one. 

for the past 3 months, i've been slightly addicted to chipotle. no, you don't understand. i've been eating chipotle 3-4 times a week for a few months now. i'll even eat it 4 days in a row and be very happy each time. 

-my normal would have to be "bowl for here please...brown rice...black...chicken...mild (*i point to mild)...corn cheese and lettuce...no (to chips or a drink)...no thanks (to the receipt)"

-i rarely go steak, the barbacoa is really good, and i just recently tried the sofritas (tofu vegatarian). it's amazing, it tastes just like ground beef, it's seriously amazing. 

-the average amount of people when i go during lunch is 17 people, and it probably takes 9 minutes til i'm in front

-it slightly irritates me when it's time for the beans, and the guy goes really quickly and a lot of bean juice gets into the bowl. i saw this one person order one time and he said "black beans, and no bean juice please". every so often i think about saying it, but i don't

-the shopping center trifecta.. chipotle, panda express, jamba juice

-jamba juice is so much better then boba. people who love boba are crazy...i mean, i'd rather have a coke zero over boba

i'm not a big starbucks fan, but i am a big coffee fan. if i had to guess, i'd say i go to starbucks 2.5 times per week (the turkey bacon breakfast sandwich is amazing). so i obviously buy giftcards on ebay for less then face value. grace drinks coffee too, so i bought her a $100 giftcard on ebay, for $78 dollars. cool, so every time that we go to starbucks, i get satisfaction knowing that i'm only paying 78% of the original price. simple

after work the other day, grace tells me something like "so i went to starbucks and my co-worker said he wanted a drink. so he gave me $4..."

i'm a dumb guy, so i said 'ok kewl, so you kept the change?'

she continued with "no, don't you see, he gave me $4 cash, and i paid for his starbucks with my gift card, he's paying 100% of his drink, and i'm paying with my 78% giftcard, and i'm keeping the difference $$$."

i was like. holy. shit. I was blown away, genius.. instaaaaa

---

i was feeling lucky so i asked grace 'just a hypothetical, 'would it be ok if a guy bought his girlfriend a gift card for her birthday, even if it was 3X the value of a "thoughtful gift?"

she said of course NOT. 

oh ok, just making sure

 i remembered a gem the other day. i remember when i was 5 or 6 years old. i think derek and i both got cash drawers as a gift. i don't know what they are called. but you when you go to a school fair and you buy a soda with a one dollar bill. the thing where the dollar bills would be stored. that thing. derek and i both had one. and i remember, derek started this game. i would go in his room. i would bring my little cash drawer (filled with quarters dimes nickels and pennies). 

derek would set up buckets and bowls around the room. each bucket would have a different denomination. one bucket would be $0.10 and another bucket would be $0.50 and so on...we would sit on his bed, and we would take turns throwing marbles into the buckets. and for example, if i made it into a $0.50 bucket, derek would pay me $0.50. if you didn't make it into a bucket, no money changes hands. 

i remember always being happy while playing this game. but thinking back on it, i was 100% getting hustled. one hundred percent getting hustled.

 there's a 0% chance that derek would let me quit the game a winner. i assume we played until derek hustled enough money away from me. i was probably just happy to be playing with my older brother. 

i asked derek if he remembers and he said yes. i asked him how much he thinks he won from me. and he said we were "about even"

horse.....shit...

i was reading this article about introverts, i think the title of the article was "10 things introverts wish extroverts would understand"

and one of them said something like "what is so hard to understand? sometimes we just want to be in the same room with you, but that doesn't mean we want to talk to you"
i thought it was funny, and very true. sometimes it's nice to be in the same room with someone, but that doesn't necessarily mean i want to talk to you.
--
just different i guess. i have the 4s and my battery life sucks. just on my way to work, my bus takes about 25 minutes, with a 10 minute walk. i leave my refugee camp with 100% and i get to work with about 62-65%. . but i'm the type of person...when i have 30-40% battery and i'm out in the world, i go into lockdown mode, i dim that shit to dark. close all my apps. you know, just in case i need to watch a really important youtube video or something.

but grace. we were waiting in line for this new boba place called Plentea. shit took probably 35 minutes, plus a 7 minute wait. while we are in line. she's on yelp with 3% battery left. i'm like whattttttt, are you crazy. 3% battery life and you're on yelp! and she didn't even dim her shit. wow. just different i guess

i just read the bill simmons column featured in the rolling stones. awesome
http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/news/bill-simmons-big-score-20140429

i learned a couple things. 

he has a stepdad, a source estimates that his salary from espn is around 5 million, and his wife's name is kari. 

i don't think people understand how much of a simmons fanboy i am. i will blindly agree and follow him. blindly. if he said he hates panda express and chipotle. i'd say i  absolutely agree, they're both disgusting.

i don't know if it's just me, but jalen rose has been slightly more annoying then in the past. i had to stop listening to his podcast, because it just started to irritate me. bottom line, i think he has great stories, very entertaining stories about his nba career. but as an "nba analyst", he's horse shit. he says all the safe things, he likes everyone, doesn't tell me anything i don't know.

i remember the last podcast i listened to, it was a couple months ago. he was talking about a prediction that he got right and he said something like "didn't i predict this exact outcome 3 months ago on this very podcast. did i not?? i said...3 months ago, on this very podcast. that so-and-so would lead his team to the playoffs...."

it's like, awesome dude, you got a prediction right. you're an "nba analyst", you are supposed to get a prediction right here and there, ACT LIKE YOU'VE DONE IT BEFORE. ffs

and how about his preseason MJ prediction. HE SAID HE THINKS THAT MJ WILL COME BACK TO PLAY FOR THE BOBCATS THIS SEASON. what???? he actually said this!!!!!!!!

i'm a hater and i know that. i think it's because i'm a simmons fanboy. so when they are together, i understand that they have to slightly disagree with each other. but as i'm watching it,  all i'm thinking is "jalen you're wrong, bill is right. jalen you're wrong, bill is right. jalen you're wrong, bill is right" the whole time

ok i'm done

when you're in high school or college, and there's a big test or midterm, when the tests get handed back, and you see your score. you can ONLY ask how other people did if you got a shitty score. if you got a good score, you CAN'T ask what other people did. that's just an asshole move. 

if the tests get handed back, and you get an "A", 96%. then you can't ask what other people got. 

but if you get back a "D", 64%, then you have every right to say "fuckkkkk me, i'm such an idiot". then you can ask how other people did. and if someone says "i got a 96%", then you have every right to say "stop bragging you dickhead"

i feel like this applies to other aspects of life. if you do something really well, then you shouldn't outright talk about it. but if you suck at something, then it's OK and slightly funny to ask about it

it bugs me when people exaggerate injuries. like, when someone gets hurt, and they exaggerate exactly how much it hurts, annoying. kids get a free pass. i was a younger brother , so i understand what it takes to survive. if derek even pretended to hit me, i'd yell "ouch. mom. derek hit me..." 

 i hate when basketball players fall to the ground, and look to be in extreme pain, then get up, smile and shoot their free throws. just generally speaking, i hate when someone experiences level 6-pain, but they act like it's level 8-pain. why not try and be tough. if you experience level 7-pain, why not try and be tough and make it look like it's only level 5-pain.