it's almost the end of the year, so that means it's reflection time. 

well, without getting into specifics. i think what i learned most this year is that unbelievable things happen. and i understand that people throw around "unbelievable" like it's nothing. but i'm being serious, truly unbelievable things are capable of happening. 

i think it's interesting, that as you get older, you realize that you didn't know shit when you were younger. when you're 17 years old, you think you know some stuff, but you realize later that you don't. when you're 22 years old, you think you've got it sort of figured out, but you don't. i mean, how do parents not tell their kids "you don't know shit". if i have kids one day, how do i NOT just tell them over and over that they don't know shit. 

i remember in college, i read a blog of a really popular poker player, and one sentence always stood out to me, he said "you're going to get more unlucky then you thought was possible". i'll always remember that, i'm not sure why. now i know i'm a pessimist, but i think it goes both ways. i think it's safe to say now, that you are going to get extremely lucky in life, more then you thought was possible. but it's going to be harder to see the lucky instances then the unlucky experiences. everyone reading this has at least 10 things in their life that someone else would die for. you have above average athleticism? you lucky bastard. you have parents that you enjoy spending time with? you're lucky. you're asian and you don't turn red when you drink? you dodged a bullet there. you met someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with? wow, don't ever complain

you're going to get more unlucky then you thought was possible. and i think everyone has to realize this. everyone is both lucky and unlucky. superrrrr lucky, and super unlucky sometimes. it's going to balance out, and if it doesn't. if you really think the luck factor doesn't balance itself out, then you're crazy, or maybe just unlucky

1 month with kirkham. kirkham is a dog.

kirkham stays with grace in davis. so i only see him on weekends.

-he's been a great dog, no complaints.

-grace lovesss kirkham. no no, you don't understand. grace lovesss kirkham. they love each other. kirkham is a little baby when grace has to leave him. he'll start to cry as soon as grace leaves

-he is super calm, very rarely barks unless a new person comes into the house for the first time.

-he loves to cuddle

-grace always says that he is "soooo smart". a typical conversation goes something like this

go- he's sooo smart!

gm- no way, he's probably just average

go- how can you say that.

gm- i'm not trying to hate, but he's most likely just average. he's probably just as smart as any other terrier

go- ugh

gm- everyone thinks that their dog is smarter then average, but EVERY dog CANNOT be smarter then average

go- you're an idiot

-when we take him out for walks/poop. we grab the collar and stand by the door. MOST times he runs up to the door and he sits, and we put the collar on, and we go. this one time, grace was cooking so i was going to take him out. i grab the collar, walk to the door and bend down to put the collar on, i say "kirkham, sit". and grace turns around and she says something like "do not tell him to sit, he already knows!" (LOLL). As if i were insulting his intelligence by telling him to sit. sooo funny. just this past week, we were ready to go outside, and kirkham would not sit, and grace didn't want to say "sit", so we stood there for about 3 minutes. i didn't say anything because i didn't want to be an asshole, but in my head i was screaming "loltoldyou LOLTOLDYOU"

-when we adopted him from the oakland animal shelter, his name was Checkers. we said no thanks, and it's been kirkham ever since. and last week, i half jokingly asked grace "do you think he knows his name". grace said of course. and then i yelled "BICYCLE!" at kirkham to see if he would respond like normal..

 for the rest of the day, sometimes i would yell "kirkham" and sometimes i would yell "bicycle". it was really funny, but i think you had to be there. we must have said something similar to this 50 times. "BICYCLE....see he looked....Kirkham....oh there...he looked....Kirkham....see he looked again...Bicycle!!! he didn't look"

poor kirkham, grace and i were joking after, he was probably thinking "i thought my name was kirkham, but now these humans are calling me bicycle???"

-you don't understand how much grace loves kirkham, it's funny, she will always defend him. when grace is around, kirkham can do NOwrong. 

=when kirkham had an accident in the house. grace will say something like "oh, that was my fault, i kept him in too long". 

=when kirkham spilled all of grace's coffee in the car, it was the "stupid leash's fault"

=when kirkham destroyed Grace's keropi stuffed animal, i said "o0o0o0o0, kirkham fucked up"..

and grace said something like "well, how is he supposed to differentiate his toys from my toys...i shouldn't have left it out"

(i wrote this 2 weeks ago)
my dad called me last week and said his friend has 4 extra Giants tickets for the Thursday game, against the Diamondbacks at 12:45. ok great, russ jon grace and I will go. it's a beautiful day, the Giants are winning, then it's late in the game, and it's time for the kiss cam. grace and i pop up on the jumbotron/megatron

1. i enjoy watching the kiss cam. it's entertaining, and sometimes funny. i always watch it, isn't it the best in-between-inning thing? i think so. just before the kiss cam starts, grace turns to me and asks me to read this "super important" email. (OK, it wasn't that important..as i started to read the email on her phone, i specifically asked "what exactly am i supposed to be reading?"....and i remember i said it with a 15% attitude just because i'm a jerk). any way, i keep reading this email, and then i hear jon and russ yell at me "grant. grant. look,  you're on. grant"

2. i look up at the jumbotron and i see the side of my face. and then i'm 90% sure i said "oh shit". and then, i look to my left, and then back to the jumbotron, and then i look to the right, and then back to the jumbotron. i was trying to see which way the camera was coming from. (this all happened in about 2-3 seconds). but it's weird when you're caught off guard like that. in that 2-3 seconds, in my head. i wanted to be able to look at the jumbotron and see myself looking straight (which is obviously impossible)

3. then grace finally grabs my face. boom. and it's onto the next couple.

4. then it was over. i asked everyone how long do you think we were on the jumbo tron for, they said roughly 6 seconds. 

5. i want to see a replay. i was telling grace that i would pay to watch a replay of the kisscam from that game. i think i would pay $200. Why don't the Giants upload it to youtube. you bastards, i'll pay! just let me pay, give me the option.

6. we were so unprepared. it's disgusting. if i had to do it over again, i think a cool idea would be just to completely ignore the camera. like before the kiss cam starts, agree to something like "grace, so if they show us on the kiss cam, look straight and don't move. ignore the world and hold it for as long as you can. you can do it"

7. it would have been nice to be watching the kiss cam and see us pop up there unexpectedly. but grace just had to show me this super important email.

next time, i'll be prepared. but there won't be a next time. how did i not buy any jeremy lin rookie cards???

i've never played daily fantasy sports, but i like the idea of it. and i can see why it's so popular. 

1. it's bull shit that fantasy sports is considered a "skill game" and poker is not. 

2. i had a close friend play daily fantasy sports and tell me about it. i don't know much, but in my opinion....there's no edge unless you have some computer/algorithmic model to help. if you're a casual fan that watches a few televised games per week, there's just not enough edge. and even if you do have a slight edge against your opponents, it's not enough to overcome the entry fee

3. first off, i think 80% of fantasy sports participants think they are better then the average fantasy sports player. everyone thinks they are sharp. i think i'm sharp, and i'm probably just average.

4. but yeah, there's no edge in fantasy sports for 95% of people playing on these sites because you can't make mistakes in fantasy sports. in poker, if you're a bad player, you can make lots and lots of mistakes. if you watch a good player and a bad player for one hour each, you can SEE the mistakes the bad player makes. but in fantasy sports, it's hard to make biggg mistakes. most decisions are only slightlyyyyyy better then other decisions (the edges are so small).  for example, if my mom faced off against the best daily fantasy player in the world, she might win 40% of the time....but if mom faced off against the best poker player in the world, she might win only 2% of the time. it's too hard to mess up in daily fantasy sports

5. i think stories like this mail guy are slightly bogus. it's in Fanduel's best interest to make people think that "hey, even this mailman can make money, you can do it too try it today!!!" i get it, they have to market it that way. fanduel needs people to think that average sports fans can win (even though only < 1% are actually making money) if this mailman was seriously making decent money, would he really not quit his day job? 

6. i know nothing, but i think that there IS money to be made in daily fantasy sports, but you need to have some computer model that no one else has. that's your EDGE. i think less then 2% of players have a model this good. the rest of the 98% are passing money back and forth. you might win 54% of your head-to-head matches, but that's not going to cut it. the entry fees will slowly eat you alive (just like Fanduel wants it).

7. i'm not hating though, i like the idea. i just don't think an average to slightly above average fantasy player can make any money playing it. if you think of it as entertainment, then go ahead, play. but if you think you're sharp and can beat it, goooood luck

my top 5 favorite robin williams movies
5. Jumanji.
i thinkkkkk that we had this on vhs. i remember liking this movie, but being 10% scared throughout the entire movie. for some odd reason i'll always remember the riddle on the first roll of the dice..."in the jungle you must wait, til the dice read five or eight!"

4. Hook.
We had this movie on VHS, and i remember i would only watch the last half of the movie. the first half was boring as balls. the last half is awesomeee when he meets the lost boys and rufio.  and one of my favorite parts was when all the kids were eating the neon colored food and then they have a food fight.

3. Jack.
I loved this movie. funny and sad at the same time.

2. Good Will Hunting.
it never gets old. i can always watch it
my 3 favorite scenes are 3) when matt damon gets the girls phone # at the bahhh. 2) when robin williams tells the story of when he knew his wife was the oneeeee 1) the very end, when matt damon had to go see about a girl (what a line!)

1. Mrs. Doubtfire.
behind Teenage mutant ninja turtles 2 and Twister, this was probably the most played vhs for me.

i'm all in on the lebron/free agency news. if he goes back to cleveland, it's huuuuge. it makes me mad though, i want to see another ESPN special, The Decision 2. this time around, i'm probably going to find out through twitter or a text message, boringg. THE DECISION was amazing, and i want another one. 

for the past 3 months, i've been slightly addicted to chipotle. no, you don't understand. i've been eating chipotle 3-4 times a week for a few months now. i'll even eat it 4 days in a row and be very happy each time. 

-my normal would have to be "bowl for here please...brown rice...black...chicken...mild (*i point to mild)...corn cheese and lettuce...no (to chips or a drink)...no thanks (to the receipt)"

-i rarely go steak, the barbacoa is really good, and i just recently tried the sofritas (tofu vegatarian). it's amazing, it tastes just like ground beef, it's seriously amazing. 

-the average amount of people when i go during lunch is 17 people, and it probably takes 9 minutes til i'm in front

-it slightly irritates me when it's time for the beans, and the guy goes really quickly and a lot of bean juice gets into the bowl. i saw this one person order one time and he said "black beans, and no bean juice please". every so often i think about saying it, but i don't

-the shopping center trifecta.. chipotle, panda express, jamba juice

-jamba juice is so much better then boba. people who love boba are crazy...i mean, i'd rather have a coke zero over boba

i'm not a big starbucks fan, but i am a big coffee fan. if i had to guess, i'd say i go to starbucks 2.5 times per week (the turkey bacon breakfast sandwich is amazing). so i obviously buy giftcards on ebay for less then face value. grace drinks coffee too, so i bought her a $100 giftcard on ebay, for $78 dollars. cool, so every time that we go to starbucks, i get satisfaction knowing that i'm only paying 78% of the original price. simple

after work the other day, grace tells me something like "so i went to starbucks and my co-worker said he wanted a drink. so he gave me $4..."

i'm a dumb guy, so i said 'ok kewl, so you kept the change?'

she continued with "no, don't you see, he gave me $4 cash, and i paid for his starbucks with my gift card, he's paying 100% of his drink, and i'm paying with my 78% giftcard, and i'm keeping the difference $$$."

i was like. holy. shit. I was blown away, genius.. instaaaaa

---

i was feeling lucky so i asked grace 'just a hypothetical, 'would it be ok if a guy bought his girlfriend a gift card for her birthday, even if it was 3X the value of a "thoughtful gift?"

she said of course NOT. 

oh ok, just making sure